to let go

Lately, the songs on my ipod are making me go the distance (in preparation for the Dam to Dam 1/2 marathon). Jars of Clay, Leagues, Mark Scibila, Jenny & Tyler, and (always standard) Josh Garrels are helping me pound out the paths around Ames. People keep asking me if I like living in Ames and I'm always a little thrown off, "I... I love it here. But, then again, I can't remember living in a place I didn't love." Even for those 6 months of couch hopping, the days were simply too full of blessings to have room for anything else. I've realized I need to have some tangible things in response because people expect a tangible take-away in these kind of exchanges.

Here are a few I've found:

  • running paths (I take a new path almost every time I go)
  • college campus (I dive into deep conversations because people will just assume I fall into the 'collegiate and questioning' category)
  • friends (I know - it's the whole state of Iowa - but it's been SO easy to meet new, wonderful people)
  • family (after living in Michigan, Texas, and Honduras, I'm back in the home state and counting my many family blessings)
  • everywhere is close (after the capital city of Honduras and then rural southwest Iowa, Ames seems "just right" for now)

Those are some tangibles, but Josh Garrels was reminding me last night to "let go of all the things I can't hold onto, for the hope beyond the blue" and man! it was making sense to my soul. With adrenaline pumping, I'm convinced my mind and heart syncopate their rhythms - like my knowledge and emotions merge for those 40 minutes. Sometimes (with earphones in), I sing out loud and pretend no one will hear. Last night, I felt moved to affirm Garrels' words with emphatic arm gestures in the middle of the forest path. I'm not proposing this is normal or that you should understand, but I am certain your soul will be refreshed at the reminder: 2 Corinthians 4:18, "Fix your eyes not on what is seen, but what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, what is unseen is eternal."

let LOVE fly like cRaZy

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Stand on the shores of a site unseen The substance of this dwells in me Cause my natural eyes only go skin deep But the eye’s of my heart anchor the sea Plumbing the depths to the place in between The tangible world and the land of a dreams Because everything ain’t quite it seems There’s more beneath the appearance of things A beggar could be king within the shadows, Of a wing

And wisdom will honor everyone who will learn To listen, to love, and to pray and discern And to do the right thing even when it burns And to live in the light through treacherous turns A man is weak, but the spirit yearns To keep on course from the bow to the stearn And throw overboard every selfish concern That tries to work for what can’t be earned Sometimes the only way to return is to go, Where the winds will take you

And to let go, of all, you cannot hold onto For the hope, beyond,the blue

Yellow and gold as the new day dawns Like a virgin unveiled who waited so long To dance and rejoice and sing her song And rest in the arms of a love so strong No one comes unless they’re drawn By the voice of desire that leads em’ along To the redemption of what went wrong By the blood that coveres the innocent one No more separation Between us.

So lift your voice just one more time If there’s any hope may it be a sign That everything was made to shine Despite what you can see So take this bread and drink this wine And hide your spirit within the vine Where all things will work by a good design For those who will believe

And let go, of all, we cannot hold onto For the hope, beyond, the blue

Said I let go, of all, I could not hold onto For the hope, I have, in you