That's right. I took a hiatus - an "interruption in the intensity or amount of something" - from the blog. I know this means I did everything wrong in the eyes of the up-and-coming blogger. Consistency is key! Well, feeling real life on my fingers was key for the past four days and maybe you'll just take my word for it. In the case that you'd rather read a few words, I'll indulge you with some snippets. In short, I get overwhelmed sometimes. I looked up the definition for overwhelmed, because I love words, and 1, 2b, 3, and 4 seem appropriate.
o·ver·whelm (vr-hwlm, -wlm)tr.v. o·ver·whelmed, o·ver·whelm·ing, o·ver·whelms 1. To surge over and submerge; engulf 2.a. To defeat completely and decisively b. To affect deeply in mind or emotion 3. To present with an excessive amount 4. To turn over; upset
Before my mom starts to worry about an impending nervous breakdown, I don't think "submerged, affected deeply, presented with an excessive amount of something, and turned over" are altogether negative things.
It's just too much.
Well, here are the snippets, anyway. Some are good and joyful and some are sad and painful. Maybe you can take all the overwhelming pieces and make sense of them.
- My light bulb in my room is burnt out and I don't seem to have the right multi-tool (which I was convinced could fix anything) to unscrew my complicated ceiling light), so I have been crafting for the last few days on my floor with the light of my computer and a desk lamp. I'm a little worried about the following: the color combos I am coming up with, my failing eyesight, the way I insist on spreading everything out around me and then bending over it for hours.
- Watercolor. It's amazing! Where has it been all my life?
- The Christmas decorations have now been up in Tegucigalpa for a good, long month. Christmas songs are streaming out every speaker and you won't find me a bit disturbed. Whoever made the rule that Christmas can't start until after thanksgiving obviously never considered that, "Come, let us adore Him" is a year-round invitation!
- I want to write. Sometimes I want to write ideas and notions so badly that I can't touch a keyboard for fear I won't do the idea justice. Words are so weighty. They are heavy and cumbersome and I love them. I wish I could find the space to fit the bulky words that have taken up residence in my soul. I'd love to park them somewhere nice.
- We are in the final stretch for our Operation Christmas Box. We're doing our own version of Christmas in a shoebox for the beautiful children of Amor y Fe y Esperanza. I'm so PUMPED!
- I've got chocolate glazed pumpkin cookies cooling in the kitchen and 31 amazing seniors to deliver to tomorrow. Yep - THIRTY ONE seniors brought their Bibles to chapel today. My prayer is that the Word would be ALIVE to them. I watched and then chewed through this message by John Piper on Sunday, "Holding Fast the Word of Life" and I want more than anything that we would hold fast to the words spoken by the Creator of the Universe! "He is the Vesuvius of joy" and we turn our heads and say it is boring. Ouch. Here is an excerpt: [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RYVF16C24yE]
- I hate sin. I mean I really hate it. I know this isn't a surprise, but this week it was closer, raw, and ugly. I hate sin that causes families to break up and the sin that causes sons and daughters to hurt and the sin that leads girls to believe lies and the sin that prevents me from being at all useful. I hate it.
- I'm still mulling over ideas about art and beauty. This is certainly one of the topics in which I'd gladly submerge myself, but I can never quite put the pieces together to write about it. I love this quote from contemporary artist Makoto Fujimura about art and culture,"We have a language that celebrates waywardness - but we do not have a language to bring people back home." That's kind of "it" in a nutshell, I guess.
- Another thing I don't mind being submerged in is God's promises. Whenever I'm faced with hardship or a tough conference or the gnarly sin sneaking in to steal joy all over the place, I remember. I remember God is sovereign. He is good. His plans are never thwarted. Yep, I'd like to be daily "presented with an excessive amount" of His complete sovereignty.
- Guess, what? THANKSGIVING is this week! I'm super-duper pumped to throw my thanks everywhere. I'm planning a Thanksgiving dinner this Friday for my senior ladies, which will involve a monstrous amount of baking. I'm also super pumped to set up our own version of a drive-in movie in someone's backyard.
- Last, but not least... tomorrow is the first-ever pep rally led by the first-ever pep squad coached by first-ever coach (you guessed it) me. I'm pretty sure this is the first time in history that someone is trying to calm high school nerves about a high school event at the ripe old age of 26! I almost couldn't sleep last night, because I'm just sure the girls are going to get out there (they have absolutely no idea what they are doing) and then run off and I'll be left to animate the crowd with my antics (which are usually reserved for small dinner parties!). Lord, help us!
Well, there it is. A comeback from a hiatus heaped up high with the verb "overwhelm."
If nothing else, I pray this night finds you
letting LOVE fly like cRaZy